Honey I’m Erect

Let’s continue our ongoing conversation about blow jobs, which will go on as long as there are willing mouths to suck penises. In other words, forever. Today’s topic: how men ask for some mouth-on-dick action without actually uttering the phrase “blowjob.” Why a man can’t just straight up ask for one? We’re not sure. Instead, most guys are cunning, using covert tactics, physical cues, and code words to try to get the fellatio they desire. And while men might think they’re being subtle announcing, “Honey, I’m erect,” we’re fully aware that they’re trying to urge us into Blow Job Land (and often, we’re happy to oblige). For the record, guys, there’s no need to make a cheese plate as a subliminal message urging us to orally indulge in your penis, but we do appreciate the gesture. Here are some other blowjob-hinting strategies we’ve been onto for years…

1. Asking you to “just kiss it real quick.”

2. Pulling his pants down and showing you his hard cock.

3. Putting on a record that you blew him to once, as if you’ll hear it and automatically open wide.

4. Lovingly moving your head down that direction while you’re sitting on the couch watching TV.

5. Suggesting that you 69 (or slowly contorting into the 69 position while going down on you).

6. Asking you to “make it wet” before you fuck.

7. Putting his fingers in your mouth and talking about how “hot” and “wet” your mouth is.

8. Announcing that he has an erection.

9. Putting his penis near your face while you’re sorting laundry, taking out the trash, or any low-to-the-ground activity.

10. Luring you into the bedroom because he has “something important to tell you,” when really it’s his dick that wants to tell you something.

11. Telling you he’s been “thinking about your lips all day.”

12. Making you a cheese plate and pouring you a bottle of wine to “help you relax” (code for “give head”).

13. Touching himself while longingly staring at your mouth.

Clever Blonde

Clever Blonde

 

Now A Days Computers

Now A Days Computers

Polite Greetings: Stop Being A Cunt, Now Fuck Off And Go Fuck Yourself

The Tale Of Bitter Truth

Polite Greetings:

Stop Being A Cunt,

Now Fuck Off And Go Fuck Yourself

 

View original post

Beauty Of A Woman

♥ The Tale Of My Heart ♥

Beauty Of A Woman

The beauty of a WOMAN isn’t in the clothes she wear,

the figure that she carries

or the way she combs her hair.

The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes

because that’s the doorway to her HEART 

the place where love resides.

The true beauty of a woman is reflected by her SOUL,

It’s the care she gives

and PASSION she shows

and the BEAUTY of a woman

with passing years only grows.

(Quran 24:26)

Women impure are for men impure, and men impure for women impure and women of purity are for men of purity, and men of purity are for women of purity: these are not affected by what people say: for them there is forgiveness, and a provision honourable.

الْخَبِيثَاتُ لِلْخَبِيثِينَ وَالْخَبِيثُونَ لِلْخَبِيثَاتِ ۖ وَالطَّيِّبَاتُ لِلطَّيِّبِينَ وَالطَّيِّبُونَ لِلطَّيِّبَاتِ ۚ أُولَٰئِكَ مُبَرَّءُونَ مِمَّا يَقُولُونَ ۖ لَهُم مَّغْفِرَةٌ وَرِزْقٌ…

View original post 54 more words